Family Reunion.

I am going to tell you something that will probably make you think less of me. I hate most of Mike's family.

 I can't stand his grandmother, Peggy. She is a conniving, scheming, lying user. She can't handle the fact that my husband turns to me with problems, instead of her. When Mike explicitly told her not to bring his mother to our wedding, she did anyway. The whole time Debbie clung to Mike as a mistress instead of a mother. I have photos. I didn't say anything that day. Not that night, but a few weeks later. He was as upset as I.

His mother, Debbie, is a crack whore who left her sons in the care of friends, family, and lovers, then left them for months at a time when she was using. I remember one story of her more steady boyfriend, Larry, saving the money to buy the boys a computer for Christmas. At that time, computers were extremely expensive, and the one he'd picked out was $1500.00. One morning, Debbie took the money and left the boys with Larry. No note, no goodbye, nada.

His Uncle, Josh, is actually younger than Mike by a month. He had a wife, Sabrina, and two kids, Hunter and Haley. We were staying the week with them. Sabrina and Mike were at work, Josh and I were home with the kids. Hunter was 2, and Haley 10 months. Hunter was eating a bowl of cereal and Haley was following him around. Hunter needed to go potty, so he set the bowl down in the middle of the coffee table and took off. I went to the kitchen to get something to drink. Josh came in from smoking outside. Haley had pulled up on the coffee table, and swiped the bowl of cereal into the floor. Josh freaked out, screaming at Hunter and pulled him from the bathroom and threw him into puddle on the floor. He rubbed his nose in it like he was a puppy that had an accident. He threw a towel at him and kept screaming at him to clean up his mess. Haley was wailing so I took her to her room and gave her a few toys. I went back to the living room and at this point, Josh had Hunter up by the throat, against a wall. I stayed back and tried to reason with him, but I couldn't. So, I walked back to our bedroom and called 911. After I hung up, I heard Hunter scream, then there was a thump, and then nothing. I ran back to the living room and he was just laying there, so quiet. Josh had thrown him against the wall. At that point, the cops got there. One thing I can say for Gadsden P.D. is they respond with a quickness. Josh was taken to jail, Mike and I were given temporary custody of the kids, and Mike's family decided he needed to get me under control because apparently, it was all my fault. According to his family, you don't go to the police, family will handle it.

After that, I wasn't welcome. Mike was, just not me. So, we stayed away. Mike wouldn't go without me. That was 6 years ago. We were informed right before Christmas that his great grandmother, Emma, wasn't doing very well and that he needed to go see her. Between the recent snow and money problems, we weren't able to go until yesterday.

It was holy hell for me. I was ignored for the most part. When my presence was acknowledged, it was with snide comments about keeping Mike away for so long and why I haven't had kids yet. Why was I depriving them of grandchildren? I'm frustrated because Mike won't see it. He was too busy with seeing his niece, and cousins. They made sure their comments were out of his range of hearing. I hate sounding like I know I do.

Mike kept the visit short, because he could read my signals. He knew that I was nervous about going. Afraid of the reaction I would cause. He took me out afterwards, but that story is for another moment in time.

Love to all,
Allie

Resolutions?

Hello to a new year. Did ya'll make any resolutions? I made one. Let it go. It was inspired by Cowboy Mouth and their song, Jenny Says.

I will be absolutely honest here. I have a serious issue with my temper and anger. For a really long time, I didn't care who I spewed my hate and anger to. It didn't matter to me. Over the past year, I've tried very hard to calm down, and think before I speak. I haven't mastered my anger, but I have gotten a lot better at keeping my temper in check.

Now, I'm trying to learn to let go of all the things that I let bother me. Bitter memories of things that could have went better. Embarrassing thoughts of retarded things I've done or said, and believe me, there have been some doozies.

That group, Cowboy Mouth, by the way, are pretty darn awesome. They are the first group I ever saw live. In the summer of 2004, right before Mike and I married, we went to the Schaeffer Eye Center Crawfish Boil in Birmingham. Oh. My. God.

For those of you who don't know, your girl here has a spaz attack when I'm in a crowd. It was craziness, and I loved every minute of it. That year, we saw Dexter Freebish, Cowboy Mouth, Better Than Ezra, and Sister Hazel. Dexter Freebish sucked. Cowboy Mouth give darn good shows. Better Than Ezra was ok. And Sister Hazel.... Le Sigh. I love them. It was magical, I tell you. To this day, I can remember leaning back into his arms and swaying along to Champagne High. It made me reminisce back to the days of being young and in love. So I went looking through my pictures to see what I had to share.

Look at how young we are! I can see the differences between now and then. It doesn't feel like almost seven years have past. They have flown by, and I love him more. He is definitely the yin to my yang. He keeps me steady, balanced, and supremely happy. Gee, I sure am sappy tonight, huh?

Anyway, what were your resolutions? Did you make any? Will you keep them?

Love to all,
Allie

So Many Words, So Little Time

Hi everyone. I am gonna be all over the place with this post. I am angry and I am sad, but I'll get to that in a little while. Right now, I want to tell you what I done went and did last week.

Now, ya'll know that my husband is a truck driver. You may or may not have known that he was leasing his own truck. That can have an upside and a downside. Sometimes, the money was good, but most of the time, it sucked. In the end, we were about $5,000 in the hole with his company. And then, last Wednesday, after I read the pay statement saying he was again $741.67 in the red, I called him and said enough. I'd had enough of him being gone for 6 weeks at a time and still not making money. I'd rather be poor and together, than alone and poor anyway. So, I told him to come home.

So... He did. He made his way to Atlanta, where I had to go pick him up. Oh My God. It was crazy. An ice storm hit while we were en route. We left Henagar at 3:00 pm on Wednesday, and got home at 5:15 am on Thursday. Within 30 miles, there were 14 wrecks that the minion and I counted. Then, at around the 290 mile marker on I75 South, we came to a halt. It took us 45 minutes to crawl a whole 3 miles. The reason? A Fed Ex truck with 53 ft trailer, flipped and was hanging over a bridge. On I75 North, traffic was backed up for 5 hours, because 2 tanker trucks collided and Hazmat was called in to clear it before traffic could go through.

I myself, lost control and slid. I was extremely lucky and was able to change lanes, and slow down before getting hurt or hurting someone else. Below is a video of the I75 North traffic jam. No, I didn't take the video. Connie was in the passenger seat.

Alright, moving on. Do you remember this hot mess?  Ok, this is what I'm angry about. Chris and I had made our peace. He had apologized for what happened. We were fine. Well, apparently, a year or so ago, he made a pass at Tabby, the other night shift girl. When my boss found out about him kissing me, she had him banned from the store. Now, it seems they want to press charges against him. That is a big negative. I refuse to do so. Like I said, he and I got straight. I'm so dang angry. I see no point for him to be banned. I see no point in filing charges. I definitely don't see a point in his job being threatened. (We have customers that have charge accounts for fuel. His company fuels at our store.) Alright, there is the anger off my chest.

I end this post with sadness. My favorite customer died. I didn't know him long, but he made an impact on my life. Elder Edward Mines was a good man. He taught me that you can still be young, no matter the age of the body. He showed me that you can be nice even when in pain. He showed me that you can be a Christian without proselytizing. He often told me that I worked too hard and that I was only sweet when sleeping. I hope he finds the home that he believed in. I hope that his passing was easy and that he didn't suffer. Rest in peace, sir. I'll think of you often.

Love to All,
Allie



Baby It's Cold Outside.

Baby, it's cold outside... Do you know that song? I am currently piled up in my bed, with the demon dogs, watching Eclipse. (Ok, so I'm technically watching it again and blogging. Bite me.) All I am going to say about the movie is this. Son, I am dissapoint. If you don't understand that, go to Internet Meme Database. Which is not to be confused with IMDB. I love both of those sites.

Speaking of things that I love.... some of you know that I am a huge movie person/nut/whatever. I try really hard to stay on top of movies and when they are coming out, so that way when Mike is home, we can go do something without actually having to do any research. Let me tell you, it is all about making his life easier.

I don't mean that in a sexist or bad way, it's just that.. When he gets home, he doesn't really want to make any decisions. He just wants to eat good food, relax with me and the demon dogs, and decompress.  And who can blame him? With a week like the recent one, he needs some downtime. In the last 3 days, his windshield has cracked all the way across due to extremely low temperatures, and a newbie backed his truck too close to Mike, ripping off the mirror and damaging paint. So, yeah, I'd say my honey deserves to relax.

Back to the movies. (Sorry ya'll. I tend to be random and ramble back and forth.) I've seen a few that are looking pretty good, according to previews anyway, so I'm going to post a link to the video with a brief description. All you have to do is click the link and it will take you straight to the website that plays it. (Website is IMDB. I trust it. That's all I can say about that.) I tend to like lots of action. Oh ha ha, smarties. I'll throw in a chick flick or two if I can find any that I want to back.

I want you to remember something. Movies are entertainment. They are not the be all, end all of the world. They are simply here to take us somewhere else, be it the future, the past, space, or somewhere not yet created in our minds. They are meant to make us laugh, cry, jump out of our skin in horror, and think. I hope you like my choices.

Cowboys and Aliens This one is for my dad. A strange mash-up of the two things he loves... Cowboys and aliens. It looks like it will be good. I know, I know. Alot of you are probably thinking... Uh, no. Give it a chance. Harrison Ford for the acting and Daniel Craig for the eye candy.

Battle: Los Angeles I'm kinda diggin the feel of this one. Marines vs Aliens in L.A. We always knew it would get hit first. Lots of action. Aaron Eckhart, Bridget Moynahan, Michelle Rodriguez, and Ne-Yo are the top names.

I Am Number Four Timothy Oliphant is the only name I know in this one so far. An extraordinary teenager is on the run from the government/his creators/bad guys? It doesn't really say, but again it looks interesting.

The Mechanic Mmmm. Jason Statham. That man is hotness defined. Gorgeous hazel eyes. Serious hard body. And of course, the accent. Drool. (Sorry Daddy.) He is an assassin, determined to take out the upper management who decided his mentor was no longer needed. The only catch? He has said mentor's son, played by Ben Foster, along for the ride. Yes. It promises to be exactly like his other movies. Lots of martial arts, lots of killing, and perhaps, if the movie gods decide to throw me a frickin bone, another striptease. (Sorry again, Daddy.)

Transformers: Dark of the Moon This is a teaser trailer, not much info, but some people might want to know about it.

Beastly Despite the name, this is actually a love story. It's a modern take on Beauty and the Beast. Only recognizable names are Vanessa Hudgens and Mary-Kate Olsen. (My husband loves to tell me there is a special place in Hades for me, between The Olsen Twins and Marilyn Manson. Me, myself, and I, would love to converse with Marilyn Manson.) And also, Alex Pettyfer, the male lead in this movie, also happens to be Number Four, from above. I didn't realize it until I was doing some research on this one.

Mars Needs Moms Animated movie. Title says it all, really. A little boy doesn't like the fact that his mother makes him eat his broccoli, do his homework, and is generally, a mom. He learns exactly how much he needs and loves her when Martians invade and take her away.

Tomorrow, When the War Began This movie actually came out on September 2, 2010. I'm including it because it looks like one of those that will make you think. I remember seeing the preview way back when and thinking... hmmm, this could be good. This is actually an Austrailian Indie flick. It just drew me in.

Anyway, that's all for now. I'm sure there are tons more out there, these just jumped out at me. Now, as for that video, that's me. Yeah, I know. Totally not what you expected, right? Oh well. Me and the demon dogs out in the snow for some fun. Enjoy.

Love to All,
Allie

Wait. What?

My week has been kind of insane. Work has been hectic, home has been hectic, and I've had the flu, and those are some of the easiest things I've had to handle.

My former phone. RIP

My phone decided to commit suicide on Thursday. It was a doomed relationship from the start. I had a tendency to drop it. It had a severe attraction to water. I would lose it for hours on end, growing more frantic in my searchings until I finally found it in the bottomless pit...aka my purse.

I went on a 6 week trip with Mike during the months of June and July of this year. Right before we left, I had slipped the phone into my pocket and climbed down from the truck. There was a puddle of water 4 feet away. Somehow, the phone threw itself from my pocket into the puddle. I didnt even notice it. My husband said, "Uh babe, is that your phone?" Of course I panicked. I pulled it apart with a quickness and dried it out. I left it off for several hours. I used Mike's phone to text my mom and tell her why my phone was off before she called in the Army. (That is a whole nother blog post. I'll go there later.) It was saved.

At that time, I was a housewife. I didn't have any commitments and could just pick up and go where the truck took me. After I got back, I was extremely bored and to the point of cleaning the house for FUN. Something very wrong in that. Anyway, my mom, who works at the Sylvania store, was telling me about the Rainsville store, and how much trouble they were having keeping good help. I know this sounds wrong, but the only reason I applied there is because I felt bad that they couldn't keep good people, and I was bored. Yes, there is a reason to this whole back story. I'm getting there. Patience.

So anyway, a couple months after I started there, I was doing my job and cleaning the bathroom. Yeah, you know where this is going, don't you? I had stuck my phone in my shirt pocket, not really thinking. I had *just* finished cleaning the toilet and had bent over to pick up piece of trash that was in the floor. PLOP. Oh, fan-freaking-tastic. Thank you god, it was clean. Otherwise, well, I'd have flushed it. After I got it out, I cleaned it, then laid it out to dry while I finished the rest of my chores. I left it apart for the rest of the night, calling Mom from the store phone to let her know I was incommunicado for a little while. She really hates that, by the way. And again, it was saved.

The months wore on and my phone and I were inseperable. We went everywhere together, having the best conversations, sending humor out into our little piece of the world. Then one day, my phone started acting a little funny. It would give me the cold shoulder and freeze up in the middle of texting. It would power down in the middle of phone calls. The phone became jealous, keeping me for itself, cutting me off from the outside world.

I tried to coax it into sharing me again, but to no avail. The final straw came when I was on the phone with my dear husband, shopping in Wal-Mart. It turned itself off and refused to come back on.The little punk took all my cool ringtones and awesome pictures with it too. I walked right over to the electronics department, and picked out a new one. (Yes. I'm a Verizon prepay user. It saves money, thank you very much. And I'm a cheap hooker. Just ask my husband.)

Now let me say this. I loved my phone. I could send 5 texts within 60 seconds, easily. I knew just how to work the buttons to make it putty in my hands.

The New Hotness. Name that movie!

So this.. this is my new phone. I like it, but there are reservations. It is pissing me off-fa-fa. And that comedian is? (Sorry, but I'm in a feisty mood, and I quote movies almost as much as guys do.) It's nice, don't get me wrong, but there a few kinks to be worked out. For example, I was texting with my friend Jamie and also with my friend James. Now, maybe this is user error here, but several times, when I was replying to Jamie, I would be in the middle of typing and a text from James would pop up. I'd choose view later, and finish my text. When it sent, it would send to James. What the firetruck? I don't understand. And while the qwerty keyboard is nice, it's SLOW. I'm not as fast as I was with the other phone. I'm sure I'll get used to it, and yes, I am eventually happy. I'm just whining. I'll get over it, or get used to it, one.

Alright, so for some more awesome updates. I've lost a grand total of 39.2 pounds. And as for the blog, I've had 944 page hits since 09/26/10. And of those, I've had recurring visits from France, Russia, Brazil, Croatia, German, and the United Kingdom, as well as the aforementioned Denmark, Lebanon, Canada, and of course, the United States. I've also had referral from sites that I've never heard of. In the photo below, my website has the TOP SPOT. Sorry for the screaming, but that is just amazing to me.

I'm going to bed now, I've got tons of stuff to do before the holidays are seriously upon us.

Love to All,
Allie

Pride.

This is CJ. He's the cousin that went shopping with me on Black Friday. Yesterday, he turned 18. I don't have kids, so I don't know how Uncle Tim or Aunt Tish felt, but, for me, it's crazy. I remember him as a fat, happy baby. I've changed a few of his diapers, babysat him a ton, and abused his muscles in my yearly move.

Anyway, today, CJ got the best news of his life. (Yeah, he's young, but wait, it's awesome.) He was accepted to the University of Alabama. The letter was dated for yesterday, his birthday. He said that it was the best birthday present he'd ever been given. Really though, it wasn't given to him. He earned it. He's a straight A student, a hard worker. Yes, I know. I sang his praises in my last post. Bite me. I'm overflowing with pride at the moment.

Uncle Tim called me not moments after CJ sent the text out. I was the first person he called. The very first. Do you know how special that makes me feel? I could hear the pride and love in his voice as he talked to me about CJ. He could hardly talk for choking up. And if you've ever talked to my Uncle, you know that understanding what he says when he's choked up is no easy thing. I love the man, but he talkes 90 to nothing. He's got a Southern twang that won't quit. When my husband first met him, all he could really do was smile and nod. Afterwards, he was like, "What was he saying?!" He, like everyone, has gotten used to it. They call each other pretty much daily while they're out on the road.

I don't know what yall's family is like, but mine are texting fools. We text, forward, joke with each other all day long. I got a forward asking this. Before the end of 2010, you and I should _____? So I answered back to that person, then sent it out. What did I get back from CJ? Go shopping again! I'm telling you ladies, a catch.

That's all I've got for now. I'm in the midst of changing over to a different phone. My old phone decided to commit suicide, and that just sucks. I'll tell you more about it later.

I love you CJ! I'm so very proud of who you are, and I know you will be epic greatness. Congratulations!

Love to all,
Allie

Depression and Black Friday.

Depression sucks. Majorly. I hate when I'm depressed. I know what is going on with me, but I still withdraw to the point of little interaction with human beings and only go out when I'm forced to. I don't understand why I get depressed. I know what causes it, I guess, but it still doesn't make it any easier to handle.

I miss my husband. I wish I was on the road with him now. I miss waking up beside him. I miss him being here. Hell, even the dogs miss him. (I say the word Daddy and they go off to the door, looking for him.)

Mike came home for Thanksgiving. He was in for 3 wonderful days. We had dinner at my Dad's house on Wednesday, because I had to work on Thursday. (No, I'm not complaining. It was time & 1/2. Can you blame me?) Mike went over to my Uncle Tim's house for dinner that day. When he picked me up, he had my cousin CJ with him. He's all happy... "Your Aunt Tish had brussel sprouts!" (A veggie that he and I both love.)

Anyway, we'd decided to go to the midnight sale at Wal-Mart. I had never been to one previously, and figured, why not? That's why we had CJ. To give a little background on CJ, he's days away from being 18. He's 6'7 and 235? lbs. He is the spitting image of his father. He is the most polite teenager I have ever met. Every time he sees me, he gives me a spine-cracking hug. He's one of the best people I know, really.

So, Mike is over by the video games with orders to pick up some that CJ would like, and to grab a griddle that is also on sale for Aunt Tish. (That was purely CJ's idea, btw.) CJ was with me stuck smack dab in the middle of panty and bra land because that is where they stuck the $20/500 threadcount sheets. Allie want!

So, CJ and I stroll up to the rack of sheets to check things out and it is already surrounded by some rude, older ladies, and a couple of girls my age. The older ladies took one look at CJ and automatically went on the offence. Going on and on about this is the Auburn side of the rack, you won't get any sheets, blah, blah, blah. Talking serious smack. CJ, being polite, said, "No, ma'am. We're Alabama fans." and proceeds to show her is Alabama tattoo. (Which I totally adore.) She laughs and says, "I bet if we cut him, he'd bleed crimson."  And, I love CJ for this, cause he's got the sarcasm that our family has perfected. He quips, "Ma'am, we ALL bleed crimson." Just smiling, waiting for her to get it. Greatness. That boy has it.

Things rock on, and another lady, probably in her mid to late 60's walks up and looks at the crowd and says, "Well, I doubt I get any sheets." She, another girl, CJ, and I get into a conversation about what sheets we want. I want a king size set, she needs 2 full size sets, and the other girl(Tuscaloosa girl) wants 2 queen size sets. The whole time, the old biddies up front are still talking smack and trying to covertly open the rack. Seriously?!

The associate walks up and makes them back up so she can take off the plastic wrap. And then.... it is GAME ON! CJ, with a quickness, hands me the one I want, goes back for the 2 the older lady wants, and then, hands me a queen size set. We back away from the crowd so we can see who has what. The old lady thanked us and left. I see Tuscaloosa girl (So named because that's where she lives.) and ask her if she got what she wanted.

She sighed and said, "No, I needed another queen size set." I hand her the one that CJ handed me and said, "Merry Christmas!" She smiled and hugged us both.

We were calling Mike trying to find out where he was while also trying to find the griddles. As we got closer to where they should be, We saw 2 ladies walking by, buggies piled high with griddles and crockpots. By the time we got there, the pallet was empty. I joked to CJ that he should've just ganked (thugged, thieved, stolen) one from the other ladies. He said, "Nope. If I can't get it the right way, I won't get it. Maybe I can find a decent one for Mama anyway." (I am telling ya'll, that is one good kid. Ladies, once he's out of college, he's going to be a catch. He's going for Civil Engineering. Smart, good looking, polite. Alabama fan. Some girl will be happy one of these days. :P)

After an hour, we locate Mike. Not only does he have a couple of games for CJ, he also snagged the last griddle. CJ just smiled. We paid for our things and headed for the Huddle House. Mmmm. Strawberry French Toast. Drool.

Anyway. That's the end of it. I'm sorry I've not been around for a couple of weeks. I pull into myself and don't really know how to get out of it. I'm going to try harder to be better at this. I love you all and thank you for the support.

Love to All,
Allie

Darkness

My mother, during our conversation.

Alright. So what I'm going to be talking about is domestic violence. How it starts, escalates, and how it ultimately ends. I originally started working on this project because of someone who lost her daughter to domestic violence. At this moment, that is put on the back burner. She's just not ready to talk, and I completely understand. So that leaves me with all this work, and nothing to run with. Or does it?

A lot of people sweep this issue under the rug. It doesn't happen because they aren't personally involved. Maybe it does happen to them, but they are too scared, or don't know how to speak up. Some block it out because they don't want to remember it.

Well, this blog is about me, so... I guess this is where I step up to the plate. I grew up in a domestic violence situation. In my mother's own words, they were volatile. I remember hurtful words, broken dishes, busted walls, and shattered windshields. I will say this for my parents, they never hit each other in front of us. It was mostly a verbal thing.

So, I went shopping. I bought a voice recorder. And then... I sat down with Mama, Daddy, and my brother B individually, and recorded our conversations. It dang near killed me. It was so emotionally charged. It was so hard to hear things from Mama about Daddy, and to hear things from Dad about Mom. It was pretty easy to talk to B. He's like me, he remembered the screaming, harsh words, and shattered windshields. Like me, he also remembers that they never hit each other in front of us.

Let me just pause here to clarify my relationships with my family. Mama is my very best friend. She has been since my first breath. I've always been my Daddy's girl. I've had conversations with them that most people don't have with their parents. I know things about their relationship and them that very few do.

I started out with Mama. The first question I asked her was, "How did you meet Dad?" She told me about the fact that she and Dad's sister Pat were best friends, and they had met through her. "How did he ask you to marry him?" She couldn't quite remember the wording, but, she remembers it went to the effect of, "I love you, and I want to marry you and the kid." (My brother B, is technically my half brother. He was born in December of 1978 and my parents were married in February of 1979.)

"Who threw the first punch?" That was one of the hardest questions to ask. We talked about how often they fought. It wasn't a daily thing. It wasn't an all the time thing. Their verbal altercations didn't always turn physical. I remember one point in the conversation, Mama told me, "Your Daddy is not a monster." At that moment, I couldn't agree with her.

How can you sit there and tell me that someone who had locked her in the closet, left bruises on her, and shattered a baby's glass bottle against the wall, is not a monster? I asked her that question. She said, "We were monsters together. We were toxic to each other. Twisted and wrong. I antagonized him so much. I couldn't let him walk away." And that made me look at her in a whole new light.

I walked away from that conversation shaken and sick. Hearing those words about my father... it didn't break me, but it hurt. I had a hard time sleeping last night.

I talked to Daddy today. I had to. If I was going to do this right, I had to include his thoughts and memories. I sat him down and told him that I was planning a piece on domestic violence, and that it was going to be about our family. Dad was a little defensive to start with. I think he was afraid that I put the blame solely on him. After I explained that Mama accepted her share of the blame, that she admitted to antagonizing him, he opened up more.

He admitted to locking Mama in a closet. I'm not telling the story that led up to it, but the gist is, they were fighting, and he was trying to walk away, but she wouldn't let him. He was extremely upset. She stayed in his face, so he put her in the closet. "I couldn't make her leave me alone, so I put her in the closet. I sat down against the door so she couldn't get out, and I cried. I cried because of what she'd done to me." I'm not condoning what he did, and there is absolutely no excuse for hurting someone else, but after hearing what he said, I understand.

I closed the conversations by asking them, "What is your favorite memory from being married to each other?" Strangely enough, both of their memories revolve around me.

Dad's favorite memory was when B was standing up in his crib and was looking at the corner of the ceiling and said, "You're not gonna take my Daddy from me." About a month later, they found out Mama was pregnant with me.

Mama's favorite memory is when she was delivering me, Dad was standing by her side. The doctor looked up and said, "There's the head." Dad looked up and said, "What is it?" Mom says the doctor kinda smirked and said, "It's a head, I'm not sure yet." When I was finally out, the doctor looked up and said, "It's a girl." Mom said that Daddy got this look of wonder on his face and was jumping up and down and yelling, "We did it! We had a girl!"

My parents divorced in 1994. Mom remarried 3 months later to a man named Greg. Along with him, I got my awesome stepbrother D and my best girl Mamy. Greg died in 1996 in a motorcycle accident. Dad remarried in 1999 to a woman named Jeanne. They divorced not even 2 years later due to the fact that they were total opposites. Mom remarried again in2006 to Mike. (We have 18 million Mike's in my family. It's tons of fun during the holidays.) I got 2 more step siblings that are pretty good. Daddy remarried in April of last year to a lady named Rita. And now, 2 more steps. All in all, I have 4 brothers, and 3 sisters. To me, half and step don't really count. Family is all that matters.

Some days I wish my parents were still together. I know that will never happen. That saying... You can't go home, I think it pertains to this. Wanting to be a child again, being tucked in by your parents, kissed and loved, knowing the monsters aren't under the bed. They are happy. They are at least cordial, if not down right friendly at family functions that bring them together.

And now... me. I am emotionally drained. As I wrote this post, I listened to the conversations I had with Mama, Dad, and B over and over again. In some ways, I wish I could figure out how to post them on here, but then again, I'm afraid some people would hear them and think horrible things about my parents.

They were young, kids really, when they got married. They were learning together, how to be the grown ups. There were several stressors in their life. Two children at an early age, very little money, and not really sure what they were doing. They've grown into wonderful people. My mother is my role model, along with my dad. I look at them and see the strongest people in the world. I love them, and I am extremely grateful to them.

Domestic violence isn't something that can be swept under the rug. It will not go away if you ignore it. Mom & Dad were both lucky that it never turned deadly, because it can. This isn't the last I'll be talking about this.

If you or someone you know is in a violent situation, please, please, please. Get help. It is hard to walk away from all you've ever known, but you can. 1-800-799-SAFE(7233) or http://www.thehotline.org/

You may be asking... Allie, why are you posting your details? Well, if all the gory details that come out save 1 life, it's worth it. If one person reads this and gets out, it doesn't matter what I go through.

Love to all,
Allie

Departure From The Light.

Funny. That is the word I hear most often when talking about my blog. Several people were shocked to see that I'm so funny. I hear that all the time. I'm cool with that. I try very hard to keep my blog easy going, family friendly, funny, and light.

Well, I'm about to step into the darkness that is reality. This will be completely out of my comfort zone. My next few posts won't make you laugh as hard as you usually do. Instead, I hope they make you think. I want you to question yourself, your family, your friends, and your relationships.

I'm hoping that the posts will still be family friendly. After all, everyone needs to be in the know about what I'll be talking about. Yes. I am purposefully withholding the topic. Why? Well, cause I can. They will all be about the same issue, just different view points. So... I'm trying to get it all laid out in my head.

I'm off the next couple of days and they will be devoted to this blog and writing in general. Good night everyone.

Love to All,
Allie

Slight Delay.

Hi everyone. My magic 8 ball was wrong. I'm not going to post the recipe today. Why? Well, I didn't have time to before work because I was trying to find a dentist that is open on Friday so my husband can go get a tooth pulled. Bless his heart, he comes in and has to go straight to the dental chair. Major suckage.

Have you noticed my penchant for making up words? Suckage. Spaztastic. Another example, instead of using the F word, I use truck instead. As in - back the truck up. I'm not kidding. Quick joke. What word beings with the letter f and ends with uck? Hey. I just told you I don't use that word. Acceptable answers are firetruck and fastduck. Thank you, I'll be here all week.

I've been mulling over the advice from Anonymous to try to get into professional writing, and I've decided to give it a whirl. A friend told me earlier today that I needed to pick someone or something local to write about and they would help me get it printed. Yeah. I'm scared spitless. I was at work when he told me that. I was thinking about it there and a woman walked in and I decided it was her that I needed to talk to. I'm not giving anymore details because if it falls through, then I'll have gotten my & your hopes up for nothing. I'm really excited about this, so I'm gonna play it close to the vest for a bit.

Alright. Time for more exciting news. I've lost 37 lbs. Yay me! Since September 26, I've had 513 page hits, with 1 from Lebanon, 2 from Canada, and 3 from Denmark. All I can say is... Holy wow, Batman. I've got the biggest grin on my face.

Well, it's time to go to sleep. I've got to get up early again so I can take my Granny to the Dr's office. If there's anything you'd like to ask, leave it in the comments. To my overseas readers, welcome. And to Anonymous, thanks for the support. Do I know you? If not, how did you hear about my blog? I'm just so curious. Anyway. Good night.

Love to all,
Allie